Welcome back, welcome back, welcome baaaaaaack…
Did y’all have a wonderful Christmas?! I absolutely, 100%, no doubt-about-it, did. This was the first time off in a very long time where I’ve completely lost track of time, so much so that I forgot what day of the week it was a few times. It really brought me back to the days when you were home on break from college and it seemed like you had all the time in the world. Sigh. I had it so good and I didn’t even know it haha.
But alas, I am a grown up and have a job and a life and here I am back in my apartment and back at my job. Not only am I back to all that good stuff, but this week also happens to be New Years – Dolce and Gabbana, hullo? – and we move into our bigger apartment on Saturday! Aye Caramba. I can’t believe it’s been a year since the last New Years. It’s been a pretty crazy – and amazing – year…. I dated (and broke up with) a complete psychopath (not an exaggeration, I am being literal, and will be sharing that story some day), I started a new position at my company, ‘Stef with an F’ moved up here and moved in with me, I adopted little baby Scooter Bot, I traveled several times to beautiful and sunny places, I had a dream for where I wanted my life to go, then I had another dream, then those dreams evolved, and now my dreams are still changing haha. It’s really been a great year for growing. Oh, I should also mentioned we tried a few new brunch spots (and some of the same old faves) and they were great. Some great brunches in 2014 🙂 and ready for even more great ones in 2015.
With that said, 2015…I have a lot of goals I’d like to accomplish within your short and quickly setting months. Of course I have my twelve monthly goals that I’ll be sharing shortly, but I’d really like to un-do what I think being a young adult in Washington, DC has done to me. You all know that famous “wear your sunscreen” graduation speech? No? Google. Anyways, in that speech the speaker (you know, that guy) says, yadda yadda yadda, live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Well I happen to love New York City and I never felt “hard” when I was there at all. I felt more adventurous and open and I was taking the subway and Path train and down in the dirty city and avoiding eye contact with people asking for what little money I had (sob, I know…one day I’ll make enough so that I can give and give and give), and I never really felt “hard…” Ok, I’ll admit it…I did feel hard when I had to trudge through Times Square to get to work and there were people dressed up as Buzz Lightyear, and Elmo, and Elsa, and Dora, and all these people asking if I wanted to go to a comedy show when all I wanted to do was get to work…I felt a little hard then.
What I’m trying to say is that I think living and working around Washington, DC has made me hard! I know that you can’t control what happens to you you can only control how you react and that’s really our freedom (you guys should all read about Dietrich Bonhoeffer…I did my final college essay on him and he’s basically a great human being…) but somewhere along the way I started reacting to all these negative and surly people in the same way I felt like they were acting towards me. I know that some people say that what you put out into the world is what you get back…I don’t always agree with that because I know plenty of people who are warm and kind and open and do great amazing things, and bad, crappy things happen to them. Well lately I feel like I’ve been putting out negative and bad energy and feelings into the world but I’ve gotten good back. I don’t want to raise your expectations too high – no miracles happened to me, these were just kind strangers saying small, nice things for no reason at all, other than kindness.
Now whether you think that’s God or karma or energy, or maybe you think it’s nothing at all other than a coincidence, that’s not really the point. The point is that I definitely think it’s all, at the very least, a sign and a message and a lesson that I should be learning from… First off, I shouldn’t expect the worst from others. Be it strangers, friends, family, whatever. Now this doesn’t mean expect them to be perfect…at this point in my life I certainly know nobody’s perfect, but I don’t have to just expect people to disappoint me. Secondly, don’t walk around looking so pissy all the time (really no better way to say it haha). My mother calls this my “mean marine face.” Now growing up in a military family, with a marine for a dad, I am good at this face. Dare I say, I am great at this face. This is my, don’t mess with me, don’t look at me, don’t talk to me, face. To be honest this face was born of good intentions… As a tiny, blonde-haired, blue-eyed girl-nay, cherub?! haha ok too much-my marine father taught me to punch hard and straight and wanted me to be capable of fending off any “bad guy,” I may encounter on life’s journey. Thankfully, however, I’m not living in the Hunger Games or in any other sort of post-apocalyptic world and I don’t really need to worry about fending off danger as I walk through the grocery store. So anyways, enough about that…basically work on my exaggerated mean marine face. (I can’t help the resting bitchy face though, so sorry but the world is stuck with that one 😉 haha)
Thirdly, (and this sort of goes with the last two) I want to be more pleasant and nice to strangers. By thinking better of them I will be kinder to them and just feel better as a human who has to live with these other humans. Fourthly, be better to my friends and family. Maybe try not being such a negative nancy about things outside of my control. This could be my job, people I have to work with, people not being able to drive as skillfully as I can haha…did I mention the people I work with? Seriously though, there are so many things outside of our control. There is absolutely no benefit to stewing and letting all this negative emotion fester inside of you. As long as you’re working on fixing or changing or growing in whatever way will make you better and happier, all you can do about things outside of your control, is change the way you react to it.
Alright, alright, enough about that…I hope nobody fell asleep reading all this. I know this is all stuff we know and have heard before and is probably extremely obvious, but this is sort of a contract for myself. By putting this in writing now, at the end of 2015 I can look back and say, “Yes! I changed and am the person I want to be.” So yea. That’s all I have to say about that. Have a great Monday y’all, and be good!